I value my membership in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.  I was born into this church by parents whom I love1 and who were faithful. They taught me the Gospel and I heard it. I attended and found many friends there, some of which have already passed away. I have had many leaders whom I loved and who loved me. I spent two years on a mission and taught about the restoration. At the beginning of that mission, I became myself (re)converted and gave my life to the Lord.

I consider this my church. It is in my heart. I don't want to give it up. Even if I currently do not attend, it has been part of my life for forty years and I want the option of returning if I choose.

I believe those who lead the church have failed to live up to their responsibilities. And while claiming to be led by Christ, it has really come to be led by the whims of men, opinion polling and by government pressure and a desire to be popular. The Gospel entrusted to us has been neglected in favor of something much less.

Anyone who has read this blog will know that I have a testimony of the restoration of the Gospel. I have a testimony of the Book of Mormon and of the Father and Son. I believe in the actuality of prophets, priesthood, keys, angels, etc.  I never had a greater testimony than that Joseph saw two heavenly beings and that he was their servant and that he was full of the love of God. God testifies to me of Joseph.

Recent interactions I have had have changed my mind regarding this church. I have found many who, if they thought me deluded, should have been endeavoring to affectionately reclaim me. And to do so by kindness and pure knowledge. I do not include my family in this; while distressed, they have been kind.

It has become clear to me that if I persist in the course I'm on, a leader will think it his duty to excommunicate me. He will think he has the pure Gospel and that I am adulterating it, when the reverse is true. And by doing so, he will wind up condemning himself. I have been given no mission to fulfill to bring condemnation upon others, but the Lord has told me that I am my brother's keeper. When I appear before God to be judged, I cannot afford to bring any prisoners, I want to let them all go free.

No matter what happens, no matter where it goes and what it commits, I will grieve, because I consider this my church.

 

Notes

1. Article: To Those Whom I Love

 

See also

Article: My Membership